BAKERSFIELD, CA-

There’s that one line from the new Dark Knight Batman movie that I keep stumbling on. It sticks in all the commercials. I hear it from my family. I read it in grafitti. It squeaks from comic book action figures: “Why so serious?” Maybe it’s because Comicon 2008 in San Diego is a place of spandex god worshippers who want their asses signed with celebrity lightning bolts. I mean, that’s gotta seriously hurt. (more…)

BAKERSFIELD, CA-

Can I just say now that spoken word poet Rich Ferguson is a great inspiration? Recently I wrote a rebellious poem-essay that I read at the Virgin Megastore in Hollywood and got freaky nervous because Ferguson showed up. OK, I would have been nervous anyway, but he was there looking like a poet gunslinger… (more…)

LOS ANGELES-

And here’s some more good news:

Jonathan Evison, contributor to TheNervousBreakdown.com, has just published his debut novel, All About Lulu, which comes to us from the fine people at Soft Skull Press in New York. The movie rights have sold, the buzz is building, and critics are calling it “a viciously funny and deeply felt portrayal of a blended family and one man’s thwarted longing.”

In short, it’s a great story. And one worth sharing.

A few days ago, I had the pleasure of chatting with Mr. Evison about his recent life and times, and I’ve posted the transcript of our meandering conversation right here at TNB.

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LOS ANGELES, CA

Every year, the New York Public Library hands out its Young Lions Fiction Award, a $10,000 prize given to a writer under the age of thirty-five who has published a novel or a collection of stories of great distinction. The award was established in 2001 and is helmed by NYPL committee members Ethan Hawke, Jennifer Rudolph Walsh, Rick Moody, and Hannah McFarland. Past winners include Andrew Sean Greer, Monique Truong, Colson Whitehead, and Jonathan Safran Foer.

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MADRID, ESPAÑA

In contemplating this post (possibly the first all-video post on TNB?) I looked into the history of the handshake and why humans have come to do it.

While it may be of (trivial) interest to note that Sir Walter Raleigh is accredited with bringing about the modern handshake (along with tobacco and thus the cigarette, the bastard) and also that it was initially used to reveal no weapons were being held and hence it was a show of trust and so on and so forth, I realized that I am not Wikipedia, that Wikipedia itself is probably only 80% accurate and that if you, dear reader, wish to know more about the handshake, reading it via my vapid digital prose (or non-plagiarized copying from Wiki) is probably not going to wow or educate you anymore than the pertinent text of Wikipedia itself.

So, JGreen and I developed this unique greeting which has been called the Viking S (more…)

AMHERST, MA-

Create a background for one of your characters by filling out this list:

Full Name: Alexander Suk Hyun Chee

Birthday: August __, 1967

Birthplace: Rhode Island. Or rather, a hospital near the campus of the University of Rhode Island, the Ocean State. Photos from that time show my parents living in a small graduate student apartment.

Current Location: Amherst, MA, in a small faculty apartment overlooking a football field. Tall old trees line the streets. All the houses I can see are white with black shutters.

Heritage: Korean/Chinese/Mongolian/Scotch-Irish.

Eye Color/Hair Color: Hazel/Brown.

Right or Left Handed: Right, for most things.

Major Strength: Students and friends believe he has X-Ray vision. (more…)

SEATTLE, WA-

1.) Hey, do you have a second?

2.) Why do some people have everything while others have nothing?

3.) Will there always be war?

4.) Why is there disease?

5.) Mental illness?

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SONOMA, CA-

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle is probably best remembered as the creator of Sherlock Holmes. The author penned dozens of stories about his eponymous character, published in The Strand Magazine between 1891 and 1905, and a novel entitled The Hound of the Baskervilles. But Holmes was only one small part of Sir Doyle’s prolific writing career. He published 50 books during his life, spanning such diverse genres as historical romance, science fiction, military history, and spiritualism. He was one of the most popular pulp fiction writers of his time, delighting readers with tales of mummies, dinosaurs, ghosts, and classic characters like Brigadier Gerard and Professor Challenger.

And then, on July 7th, 1930, he dropped dead.

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SEATTLE, WA-

Two years ago I interviewed Sherman Alexie for the second time. The interview was going to be a centerpiece of a theme issue for a magazine that I had written for a number of times before. The editors decided to scrap said theme and the interview hung in limbo for nine months before the managing editor killed it.

I’ve interviewed dozens of individuals from Wanda Sykes to Ron Jeremy and Alexie remains among my favorites, both because his art impacts my life and because he is boundlessly intelligent. He sends my mom the sweetest thank you notes when she sends him baklava, plus, he is the only person who’s ever had the balls to write her and say, “Could you please send more?”

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COLUMBIA, MARYLAND-

While Jilly and I were living in Vermont, we happened upon this fantastic guy named Milton Young. We were both in a J. Lo phase at the moment and, having shortened just about everyone’s name to a J. Lo incarnation, we began calling him M. Yo. It stuck and, three years later, he’s still M. Yo.

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By My Little Pony & 11:59

-THE DIRTY SOUTH-

When I first met My Little Pony she was naked. I recall some southern
comedian saying the difference between naked and nekkid was that nekkid meant
you didn’t have any clothes on and you were up to something.

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LOS ANGELES, CA-

What’s your greatest fear?

To lose my sense of humor at the moment of my death. Somebody famous said that once. I forget who it was, but I like it. And I’m stealing it from them.

You find death funny?

Not really. But I guess it depends on the context. In some extremely rare instances, I would imagine that it could be authentically funny. Most of the time, though, it’s pretty grim, pretty lame, pretty wildly uncomfortable. And so when faced with this circumstance and its utter inevitability, and in light of the fact that things tend to mean what we think they mean, I’d prefer to go out with a laugh as opposed to a whimper. I’d prefer to see it as some sort of cosmic joke that humans just don’t get, and then proceed from there.

Do you have any phobias?

None that I know of. Nothing official. I’m slightly uncomfortable on airplanes, but I still fly. I’m not too big on sharks, but I’ll still swim in the ocean. Maybe if I had to pick a phobia, it would be bombs. Or concentration camps. I’m wildly uncomfortable in the presence of bombs and concentration camps. (more…)

BOUNTIFUL, UT-

In 1992, Gail Andersen Newbold published On New Wings: Mormon Women Rediscover Personal Agency and Conquer Codependency.

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SACRAMENTO, CA-

As I look through the glass window on the observation deck I count 26 workers sorting through discarded paper, plastic bottles, soda cans and wine bottles as they whiz by on a conveyor belt.

I’m watching this and wondering how they can possibly be sure they’re getting everything sorted into the right slots, but then my tour guide tells me that each person on the sorting line is assigned one item so they don’t have to concentrate on too many things as the mounds of recyclables pass them.

One person frantically searches for colored glass, while another one looks for #3 plastics (PVC, found in your household through food wrapping, blister packages and vegetable oil bottles). (more…)

PHILADELPHIA, PA-

I once wrote a letter to the late author Kurt Vonnegut. This was during college, and as I remember it, the letter was a long, rambling, Jack Kerouac rip-off, full of gusto and undergraduate angst.

Basically, it was embarrassing.

Vonnegut never wrote me back.

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