For 46 years HANNAH WEHR was a teenage runaway. In that time she did things she wouldn't force on a donkey and that includes things she forced on a donkey. Hannah is German slang for "I Don't Know." That about sums her up. Hannah is an unwitting connoisseur of French cigarettes and filthy men. In Bolivia there is a saying about her, and it goes: "Girl with monocle has nothing. Cover her in shaving cream. Calling all cars.” It translates weird. Hannah spends her free time eating other people’s food, thinking about Abraham Lincoln’s hat, attacking strangers' calves, making Thanksgiving dioramas, and boondoggling.

What the critics are saying:

“Hannah has a great personality---just not for a human being.” –Jasper Tin Pan Lintstockings

“She is a fire hazard.” –Old man with shrimp tail stuck in beard

“I think she just spilled her wine on my kid's head.” –Lady who will probably never ask her to babysit again